dah! tired..

3.29 am, i just finished my set of data (work). tomoro got work at 10am.

ya im blogging now becoz im feeling emo. i realised that everyday i got home from work i feel very sad. maybe because i did nothing meaningful but work. sure its making money. but maybe im the type that loves to create things myself. doing other people's things are damn meaningless to me. but yet if i dont take this job, i cant afford the things i want.

and i got a dilemma, you see, its counted by hours. i've optimised my work routines many times compared to when i first started (things like opening 2 windows together, reorganising their spreadsheet so i can copy and paste data instead of wasting time scrolling, highlighting so i know where i am instead of finding entries). and the faster i finish, the less pay i get. but i really want to get out of this asap, the work place's ppl are not really friendly (NOT mean, but basically its boring). currently data is at 350. i got 988 data. my work rate is 70-80 data per day. plus some cannot be updated due to insufficient information. anyways, i want this to finish asap.

phew, job over

so, suddenly call me and ask me if i want to replace one person (because he's sick), of coz want la, currently no job.. so next day go work straight away.. (which sort of clashed with a previous schedule, but heck care, just go work)

job: audio logistics crew. move those speakers, play the cd, bla bla..

1st day: report at 1pm. load stuff into van, unload there, set up all the equipment, wrap them up. off to next location. again. off to third location. again. i cant believe its only 6 hours, but that day felt damn long and tiring.

2nd day: report at 11am. plug wires. ferried to second location. plug wires, tidy the cabling. wait for event to over. leave at 9pm. not so tiring though coz evening we were just watching the thing.. no chairs to sit the whole day. no toilet or food around either.. yea, theres no toilet, no chairs.

3rd day: report at 9am. i expected everything to finish at 10-11pm.

9am-12pm: rearrange stuff. watch press conference. get to eat their buffet. this time they actually brought chairs.

12pm-1pm: take down everything and pack everything.

1pm-3pm: take down and pack everything up and load it into vehicle. go back office to unload. rest for awhile.

4-5pm: rearrange stuff at their office. prepare to go next venue.

5pm-7pm: test everything. wait for event to start.

7-11pm: watch the event, relax, eat.

11pm-1am: start packing up. load. go back office. unload. go back venue. load. go back office. unload.

total pay: $200... not very much.. plus its technically work 4 days la.. now damn damn damn tired.. never scotchtaped so many stuff in my life before.. although the event was quite interesting la.. its international event with famous names.. tiring but fun and interesting job.

nothing much, 20000 days remaining on this earth

woo! count until 20000 days remaining, no i'm not emo today, and somehow typing this makes me feel emo, but no.. just a reminder of how things actually are.

54 years, 290 days to age 70.. thing is, i'm so scared of everyday now i wonder if that day will even be reached.. everyone talks about doomsday as if its nothing.. but somehow i treat all of this extremely depressing.. i avoid all these topics..

the money no enough 2, 3 days after watching, one scene still stuck in my mind and can still make me tear.. the part where the ma found out she got sent to old folk's home, that particular shot on her face. just remembering that alone makes me feel like tearing up even now..

anyway, reality is this, 20000 days to age 70.. i can't remember when i started from though.. i never track it at all.. everyday i just delete it casually, sometimes it makes me feel scared as i strike off a day, but still, remember, she is there, i will not be alone.. and so will everyone..

11 days to her birthday ^^